Back in October, I mentioned that I felt our little one kicking around. They were swift kicks but they were very high in my diaphragm. Yes, this was very high, since the baby was still quite small, but I honestly thought that the baby was moving around in its home but it triggered feelings much higher in my torso. Later that week, I had another doctor’s appointment. After he checked the heart beat (waaaaaaay down in my lower belly), I told him the feelings I was having. I told him that I was surprised to feel them so high. His response?
“Oh, that would be your intestines. The baby is pushing all of your organs up, so you were feeling your intestines working.”
Lovely. So it really was gas. Bummer.
I have been waiting patiently since then to feel the real “flutters”. Please understand that in my mind, I need to feel them for confirmation. I know that I should not live in worry, but I am often scared that something horrible is going to happen. (I do this to myself WAY too often.) I am a plus size girl so I have a feeling it may take me a little longer to feel those special kicks but I am really ready to feel them.
This morning, I stopped to grab a biscuit and instead of a caffeinated drink, I opted for some lovely orange juice. Might I add that this was the first biscuit I have had in almost 2 weeks? All of our money is being drained in doctor bills – but J-Man was brilliant in swaying Daddy J in allowing us to stop for one.
Back to the orange juice… I guess this baby is in love with orange juice – just as J-Man was when he was in utero. Just about an hour after having my orange juice, the baby did a back flip. I haven’t felt it since, but I needed that this morning. I needed the re-assurance that everything was still okay.
Today I am thankful for life. Every. single. breath. As I took an extra few moments with J-Man this morning to have a tickle fest with bunches of giggles, I was reminded of the most precious things of this life. And after feeling our baby today, I was reminded of the miracle of life and the Life Giver.